Thursday, October 8, 2009

Famous People and Dating Advice


There are two orders of business within today’s blog: Firstly, to smack the resounding gavel and call your attention to our first of many celebrity-signed copies of our Gazette (see figure 1 and the photo below of Amy Hood holding her interview with new Los Angeles Laker Ron Artest, which he himself signed and sent back to us – thanks, man, looking forward to the new season!).

Secondly, this blog will serve to give you information about some help that you may or may not admit that you need: Dating Advice (see figure 2). Did you know The Gazette has a new columnist-duo, Sunny Wheeler and Ron Ruhman (former is a dating vet and latter is a local comedian), who are asking for the privilege to answer all of your dating dilemmas? Don’t be shy, here’s how it works.

1. Figure out your problem. Sunny and Ron, in their own words, “are dedicated to those of you who are dating, looking to date, or like to eat dates.” If you are in any of those categories, it can be inferred that you also suffer from plaguing questions like the following:

“What is first date etiquette?”

“How do I pursue a date without incurring a restraining order?”

“It’s the 21st Century, can we go Dutch yet or what?”

“What exactly does ‘Thanks, I had a great time’ mean?”

Or, “How soon is too soon to elope to Vegas?”

2. Come up with a pen name. Now, based on your dilemma, create a pseudonym for yourself under which you can send your anonymous request for relational salvation. Your name should be made up of a descriptive adjective and a noun of some sort, and note that alliteration is always a nice touch. Here are some examples:

You got dumped by an actor who’s still in love with his ex? Your name is: Hurting in Hollywood. Someone is interested, asks you out, and then never calls again: Confounded Crier works nicely. This can be the fun part in the whole thing.

3. Send your question to datingdilemmas@gmail.com and wait for advice from the funny yet insightful tag-team, Sunny and ron. Then look to see if your question is published in the next Gazette. Prepare yourself for unexpected answers and honest commentary. Also prepare yourself for some laughs and a little more clarity in this game of love.

Salutations,

Jen

On my iPod: Hellraiser by Motorhead

2 comments:

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  2. Sooo, what ever happened to "Dating Dilemmas"? I thought it was great.

    ReplyDelete

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